


take a moment's rest from your hectic lives

by coolbreezemage



Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, can be read as shippy or platonic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-13 13:35:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29029536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coolbreezemage/pseuds/coolbreezemage
Summary: Tilly and Saru recover after a disastrous away mission, and learn some things about leadership in the process.
Relationships: Saru & Sylvia Tilly
Comments: 16
Kudos: 24





	1. Chapter 1

There was a roiling electromagnetic storm of some sort preventing their transporters from working. Because of course there was.

“The storm is increasing in power,” Saru said, without even looking at his tricorder.

Tilly didn’t know a ton about the range of Kelpien senses, but from the way Saru was rubbing absently at his head, she figured he could feel it in far more detail than she could.

“That’s not a good sign.” She peered at his hand. “Does that hurt?” she asked, not sure what she’d do with the answer if it did. 

Saru stopped the motion abruptly, almost like a human kid caught picking his nose. “Not exactly. It is... uncomfortable, but bearable.”

“I’m sure Culber or Pollard has something that could help.”

He shook his head. “No. Dulling the sense would be a liability. I would rather be aware of it.” 

That made sense. Still, she wished it didn’t have to hurt him.

They continued through the valley, carefully stepping over stones. Somewhere down here there was supposed to be a disabled mining probe waiting patiently for rescue.

Tilly coughed. Something was stinging insistently in her throat. Dust? It felt worse than that.

Saru looked down at her with concern. “Are you all right?”

She winced. “You’re not feeling anything?” she managed, the words choked and rough.

He shook his head. “No. The scanners aren’t showing anything either.” He tapped the controls. “Trying a wider range...”

Maybe she’d just choked on some dust or her own spit, or her allergies were acting up again. How embarrassing. And with the Captain too, that made it even worse, even if he’d never judge her for it.

She coughed, and coughed again while trying to catch her breath. Her vision was starting to fog. Whatever it was they’d run into was burning her eyes like when she’d tried to cook something with real grown-in-the-dirt onions, but ten times worse. 

She rubbed at her eyes, swiping away stinging tears. “Captain, I- there’s definitely something wrong…” And then the burning spread to her throat and her chest, and she could hardly breathe.

Her tricorder shrieked a warning, but her eyes were too blurred for her to make it out. She felt Saru take it from her hand.

He said something, but she couldn’t hear it over her coughing. “I can’t- I can’t-“ See, breathe, move… The air was thick and burning, and there was nowhere to escape it.

“Then let me help you.”

She was going to ask what he meant, and then everything tilted under her. He was carrying her like she weighed nothing, and she had a moment to wonder why it was that aliens always seemed to be so much stronger than humans.

Time faded out, replaced by pain and motion and Saru’s steady voice promising safety.

There was the crackle of a communicator, the familiar electric fuzz of a transporter.

She heard Pollard say something about toxins and organ regeneration, and then there was the hiss of a hypospray and everything faded out.

* * *

If you’d asked Tilly before today, she would have thought that waking up after an organ reconstruction would be refreshing. Whole new organs, right? But no, she felt like a squashed tribble. Everything ached, her lungs most of all. Her mouth still tasted like onions, and looking at the bright lights of Sickbay threatened to give her a headache.

Hugh Culber’s face drifted into focus above her. “Welcome back,” he said.

“Hey, Doc.” Even talking hurt. “What time is it?”

“Beginning of Gamma Shift. You were in that regenerator for a while.”

She groaned. “Feels like it. Am I back in one piece now?”

“Mostly. You have Saru to thank for that. He carried you past the edge of the storm so we could beam you both out.” He smiled. “It was very heroic. The whole crew’s talking about it.” 

She tried not to blush. That was an image she was going to savor for a while. “So what happened to me?”

“It looks like you ran into a nest of airborne amoeba. I’ve been studying a sample. There’s something about their cell membranes that makes them difficult to scan, which is why it took so long to figure it out.” Culber pulled up a graphic on the holographic display, but Tilly’s eyes hurt just looking at it. “They’re pretty nasty,” he continued. “If they get inside your body by you breathing them in, they break open and release toxins that dissolve your tissues.”

She made a face. “Shit, that sounds bad.” 

“Yeah, you were really lucky.”

“What about-“ She couldn’t finish. The ache in her chest exploded into coughing, and she spent several moments just trying to survive as the spasms shook her.

Culber had a hand on her shoulder and a scanner at her chest within seconds. “Careful, you’ve just had the inside of your lungs regrown from scratch, and then there’s the treatment on your eyes. You’re going to need to take it easy for a while.”

But there was so much that needed doing...

“I’ll try.” She sighed. “I bet the Captain’s going to want a report on how we missed the amoeba swarm. Did the storm stir them up or something?”

Culber nodded. “Already working on it. We’ve got some time, though. Saru’s still unconscious, but his vital signs look good.”

“What?” Alarm spiked in her chest, nearly setting off another round of coughing. “He’s hurt too? I- I thought it only affected humans.” She tried to pull herself up, but Culber pushed her down again. 

“So did I,” Culber said, his voice deceptively light. “But it turns out  _ somebody _ was hiding symptoms. Michael found him wheezing in one of the science labs, trying to study the stuff.”

Tilly winced. “Oh no. That’s not good.”

“Yeah. We’re going to be having a talk about that later.”

Ooh. That would be rough. Culber did a  _ really _ good I’m-disappointed-in-you voice. Almost as good as Saru’s own. She hoped she’d never hear either of those again, but she knew she probably would.

“So he’s gonna be okay?”

Culber smiled his soft reassuring smile at her. “Don’t worry, it’s a lot easier to treat him now that we have a Kelpien medical database with a sample size larger than one.” He sighed heavily. “It would help more if we had an obliging patient, but I suppose I’m not that lucky.” 

She was going to be having a talk about it too, she decided. After she thanked him for saving her. 

That was part of the First Officer’s job, after all. Telling the Captain when they were making a bad decision or pushing too far past their limits. 

She really didn’t want to do it. But Saru wouldn’t have appointed her if he didn’t trust her to stand up to him. Right? He’d been a bit cagey about that answer. 

Well, she was going to do it, and he was just going to have to deal. 

* * *

“It was a delayed reaction,” Saru insisted, as Culber hovered over him with a scanner. 

Tilly hung close by, trying to look disapproving but probably failing. Just being on her feet was an effort but she'd do it for him. She wanted to see for herself that he was all right, and she had some things she needed to say to him.

“A serious one,” Culber said.

“I did not feel anything amiss on the planet’s surface.”

Culber wasn’t impressed. “You still should have come to me right away when you did start feeling it. This thing could’ve eaten your lungs before we could save you.”

“I am aware, Doctor, and I apologize for the trouble.”

“Apologize by taking better care of yourself,” Culber said, and it sounded like something he’d said hundreds of times before to lots of people.

Sometimes it seemed Starfleet officers were all the same, noble to a fault and always ready to go haring off into danger. Michael had proved that too many times to count. 

Well. She’d do all she could to keep their Captain safe. They needed him, after all. 

He leaned up from the bed to address Tilly. “I’m glad to see you safe, Ensign,” he said. 

“You too. That was pretty scary. Sorry I wasn’t more help...” She knew she looked terrible, even after the organ regeneration. At least it wasn’t the first time he’d seen her in just a hospital gown. 

“You handled yourself well under the circumstances,” he said, sparking a warm glow of pride in her chest. “We will study the creatures and make our reports to Starfleet so that this will not happen again to any other explorers.” 

Culber shook his head. “Mhmm, I’m not clearing you for that just yet, Captain.”

“Reading lab reports is hardly strenuous, Doctor,” Saru argued.

Tilly agreed with Culber. “You should let the crew handle it.”

“Ensign-”

She stepped forward. “No, uh, y-you’re going to listen to me this time, Captain,” she insisted, speaking quickly half out of anxiety and half so that he couldn’t interrupt her. “Because that was really bad. I mean, really bad. According to regulations you should have gotten scanned when you came back onboard but Culber says you didn’t so I’m guessing you snuck out or something, which is  _ very _ irresponsible.” She paused for a breath, noticed Culber nodding in agreement, and before she could lose her nerve, continued. 

“You went to all that effort to save my life, and I’m really really grateful for it, because I like being alive and that was awesome.” She laughed nervously before turning serious again. “But you could’ve died because you didn’t let anyone take a look at you, and that’s what the doctors are here for, you know? And- and we all rely on you, and since you made it my job to call you out when you’re not being reliable, uh, I’m calling you out. Sir.”

She stood there in the silence waiting for a response and resisted the urge to bury her face in her hands and cry-laugh at her own daring. She’d faced down Orion hijackers, she could deal with a stubborn captain. But Saru had gone unusually still, and she couldn't tell if he was mad or not. 

And then Culber grinned. “Couldn’t have put it better myself. You’re gonna have to watch out, Saru, she’s sharp.”

“So I see. Well-spoken, Ensign,” Saru said at last, nodding to her. “And well-deserved.” He made a sound that might have been a sigh but turned into a cough. 

Good. He wasn’t mad at her. And maybe that meant he would listen.

“All right,” Culber said, steering Tilly back towards her own bed. She needed it, she was still shaking after that impromptu speech. “That’s enough talking for now. You both need to get some rest. I’ll be keeping you both here tonight, by the way, sorry about that.”

He didn’t sound very sorry, and neither of his patients were happy about the decision, but Tilly wasn’t about to spoil the point she’d made by arguing with him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tilly and Saru recover.

As it turned out, Kelpien lungs were structured a little differently than human ones, and so Saru hadn’t needed nearly as drastic a reconstruction as Tilly had. But Culber had still ordered him several days’ rest to make sure everything was back to normal before he put himself to any strain. Tilly had been given the same orders, along with daily checkups to monitor the regrowth of her lung tissue. 

But like all Starfleet officers, neither of them were happy sitting still for long. There were only so many holoshows and cheesy romance novels you could go through before you were aching to be on the Bridge or the labs again. Or at least that’s what it was for Tilly. She was pretty sure Saru was doing more productive things with his time. She wondered what. 

Which was how Tilly eventually found herself in Saru’s quarters going through a collection of reports from some of the newly-rejoined Federation worlds. At least Culber hadn’t deemed paperwork off-limits. 

Saru’s quarters were nice. She’d expected - well, she didn’t know what she’d expected, maybe something spartan and formal with a few personal items, but it was like a miniature forest in there, warm and humid with bright flowers everywhere you looked. It was beautiful. For once, she didn’t need to be told for her to realize it was a great gift to be invited into his space. 

And it was good to see him in a space designed for him, instead of awkwardly trying to fit into human-sized chairs and lab stations. Tilly had always thought that looked uncomfortable, but she hadn’t wanted to say anything in case that would be rude.

She still struggled to catch her breath sometimes, even nearly a week after the lung reconstruction. It made reading out reports difficult, but she kept going, deciding that she’d consider it physical therapy. 

Saru was always patient with her, waiting for her to have breath to speak when she could, or filling the space with his own words if it hurt too much for her to talk. Sometimes, though, they were quiet, and it felt just as good. 

“I hope I’m back to normal soon,” she said, watching him tend to his plants. “You’re doing all right?”

“A little fatigued, but otherwise I am well,” Saru said, inspecting the petals of a gorgeous orange flower. “And perfectly capable of duty. I suspect Doctor Culber’s orders are less out of medical concern and more his idea of discipline.”

Tilly wasn’t surprised. She raised an eyebrow. “For not telling people when you’re hurt?”

Saru clicked at her in a decidedly exasperated manner. “Ensign…”

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to lecture you.” Tilly tried to smile, but it still worried her that he’d tried to avoid medical care when he clearly needed it. “But, uh… please don’t do that again.”

“I do not plan to,” Saru said. Something about the way he said it was trying a little too hard to be comforting. There was something going on there.

Tilly twisted her hands together in her lap, hoping that she still had enough daring in her to finish the sentence. She had to know, she reasoned, so she could protect him.

“Is there a - I mean, you don’t have to say, you can just tell me to shut up - but is there a reason you didn’t let them check you out?”

Saru considered that for a long moment, long enough that Tilly was just about to change the subject and forget about it when he answered.

“I have not had the best of experiences with human doctors,” Saru said. “There was a woman at the Academy, a xenospecialist assigned to determine any unique needs I might have.” Because of course the Federation wouldn’t know anything about Kelpiens until Saru came along. “She was… overly curious about studying a new alien. She did nothing directly harmful, but it was… not pleasant.”

His tone was still light, but Tilly could hear the bitterness in it.

“That’s  _ terrible _ ,” Tilly breathed. “I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to deal with that. Because we’re all people no matter what species, and it’s part of the Federation’s founding principles to treat others as equals.” The idea of someone treating Saru - or any student, but most especially her kind, brave Saru - as a lab experiment or fascinating specimen, that made her want to punch people, and she’d never been good at fighting. 

But that doctor was long dead now, so there was nothing she could do about it but try to help her captain feel safe with the medical team they had.

“Most I have met in Starfleet have upheld that view,” Saru said. “But there are some who are less thoughtful.”

And on ships built for mostly-human crews, it would be easy to forget that. “Doctor Culber…”

“…is utterly respectful, yes, and highly accomplished at his work, but it does not make the process any less uncomfortable.” 

“I get it.” She nodded. “We’re here to help you.”

Saru clicked softly. “Ensign Tilly. I promise you that I will seek aid if it is necessary.”

She smiled. That was all she needed. “Good. We’ll be back on duty soon, you know. He knows you don’t like staying still when there’s people you can be helping.”

“Exactly.” He went to the replicator and ordered tea for both of them. “Fortunately, there is still something useful we can do while obeying the good doctor’s orders,” he said, handing Tilly a cup. It was some blend from his homeworld that tasted a little like green tea and a little like the sea, and she might have been imagining it but it always seemed to make her feel better after a round of coughing.

“Thanks.” She wrapped her hands around the cup. She didn’t need the warmth, not when the room was so cozy already, but it still felt nice.

“Admiral Vance wants our opinion on some of his current crop of troubles.” Saru sat down in one of the properly-shaped chairs and pulled up a holographic list of files. “Nixtus V is suffering a drought in the western continent due to unusual weather patterns.”

“We could send them some low-moisture cultivars,” Tilly suggested. “I read a report on them a while ago. There’s some plants from the Talethian system that are supposed to be really nutritious and they’ll grow almost anywhere.”

Saru nodded and made a note. “It would be a more effective answer than sending cases of famine rations.”

Tilly hid her helpless smile at the praise in her teacup, but she was pretty sure he noticed anyway. 

She reached up and flicked to another report. “And there’s political upheaval on Baron Prime. It says here that workers on the lunar colonies are staging protests against the new planetary government’s trade policies.” 

Saru considered that. “The Federation can send arbiters to assist in working out an equitable solution.”

“Let’s hope they listen.”

* * *

It surprised Saru, how much he liked having her here.

Since he had left home, he had never enjoyed having other people in his private space. They always talked too loud, moved too fast, never understood how it set his senses on edge. 

On the  _ Shenzhou _ , he had invited Michael in a handful of times, Michael with her Vulcan manners and human arrogance. But they would inevitably end up arguing over something or other before too long. He hadn’t been close enough to anyone else to consider asking. And even after the change, he had kept to himself when he could. He loved his crew, but he needed that space as well.

So it was a wonder beyond wonders that he could be so comfortable with bright, excitable, talkative Ensign Tilly beside him. But he was, and they worked so well together that it was a benefit in every way he could think of. So for those few strange days when they weren’t allowed any official shifts, it became their routine that she’d join him in his quarters to work on what they could. 

She had not been pleased with him for hiding his condition. He had borne her admonishments with grace, secretly impressed by her nerve even as the necessity embarrassed him deeply. It had not been that long ago that she had been so intimidated she would barely look at him. 

She would be a great leader someday. She’d proved that long ago. Brave, but not reckless, not willing to risk too much for too little gain. Willing to listen to her allies, but insist on her own way when it was needed. And she would not leave any of her people behind, as he knew well. 

He truly wished her first taste of command had been under better circumstances. The experience had fed her doubts as much as it grew her confidence. 

“If- if we’d been a moment later, or if Osyraa had figured out what we were doing…” she had fretted, thinking back on that terrifying time.

In answer, he had put a hand on her shoulder and said, “And yet, you succeeded, and saved the entire ship and more besides. Once you have learned for your experience, it does no good to ponder on what might have been. I know that well.” 

She had smiled at that, and finally relaxed. Not the exhausted relief of out-of-danger, or the anxious hesitation waiting for his and Vance’s judgement on her performance, but the calm of confidence.

He wanted to see her like that more often. Provided, of course, that it didn’t involve her being gravely injured first. Down on the planet, he had been so distracted by the electromagnetic disturbance in the air that he hadn’t thought to scan for dangerous lifeforms. But they wouldn’t have been able to pick them up in time even if he had. So there was no reason for him to feel guilt over it, yet he did. That image still haunted him, watching her struggling to see or breathe with no identifiable cause. He had never been so grateful for his Kelpien speed. 

And so were the others. He was not especially pleased to be the subject of gossip, even the admiring sort as Doctor Culber had promised was the case, but that had been a constant since his Academy days and he wasn’t going to reprimand the crew for their private pursuits. It was simply something he had accepted as part of the price of being a novel alien in Starfleet. 

He thought of Tilly’s words, how he’d disappointed her, let his anxieties keep him from seeking help. When they’d first come to this new time, he’d taught her to rise above her doubts. And maybe now he could learn the same lesson in return. That thought stayed with him as they worked their way through the reports and he noted down answers to send to the Admiral later.

When he closed the last file, Tilly leaned back, laughing when a fern tickled her nose. “We got a lot done.”

“We did.” He set their teacups aside to be recycled.

Tilly sat up and looked at him. “Maybe we could… keep working like this? Even when things are normal?”

He would miss having her here, he realized. “Of course,” he told her, earning a delighted smile. “I would like that.”

They were set to return to duty tomorrow. Saru was very pleased about that. He still worried a little every time Tilly coughed, but all of her scans showed progress, so he could trust she would stay well.

As if someone elsewhere on the ship had read his mind, the communicator chirped. “Hey, hope it’s not too late,” came Doctor Culber’s voice. “Just reminding you two I need to see you in the morning for one more scan, just to make sure you’re fully recovered.”

“Understood, Doctor,” Saru said. He realized with a little sting of regret that he’d already been thinking up excuses to be done with it as soon as possible, or avoid it if he could. But no, he wouldn’t give his First cause to scold him again.

Tilly, of course, was wondering the same thing. Her mind worked fast. It was one of the things that most impressed him about her. 

She cast him a meaningful look. “You gonna be all right with that?” she asked. 

He nodded. “Yes, I believe so.”

They were his crew, his family, and they could rely on each other. 

**Author's Note:**

> I love these two so much. However you interpret it, I love their relationship and how it grows. From their commonalities over anxiety and doubt to the mentorship dynamic to working as a command team. He validates her, she protects him, neither of them will stand for nonsense, and they'll always help their friends when they're hurt. They make a great team.
> 
> My Star Trek Discord: https://discord.gg/bKzEmm552J


End file.
